SPEAK UP! (even if your voice shakes)

Posted on March 30, 2018January 17, 2026 by Sandy

When I sat down, I was going to talk more about WAG.

As ya’ll know, I’m giving WAG (Working Against Gravity) another try. I had heard that a number of the things that I commented on 2 years ago had changed dramatically.

This is what work has felt like the past month. Hasn’t crushed me YET though!

Work has been crazy the past month, so I haven’t even had a moment to breathe – much less blog. But I’d like to make a couple comments, before launching into what I actually sat down to write about

*WAG now has a fantastic knowledge base and spectacular “drip” email system. Two years ago, one thing that I had found frustrating was that WAG didn’t have any information that came directly from “WAG HQ” as it were.

I am sure I’m not the only one who has “clicked on a link” to get something from some guru or another, and wound up on his/her email list. Some have “eh” info or are pushy in their “upsell,” and I ultimately unsubscribe. But some have great info and I’m still on their lists years later. My issue had been that you are paying a premium for WAG and – at that time – the only thing that was available on an ongoing basis was the Facebook group . . . made up of other folks who have paid to subscribe to WAG, just like you. Now, not only do they have a deep Members Only “library” that you can dip into (with everything from macro-based Trader Joe’s shopping lists to Mindfulness exercises), but WAG HQ also now sends members bi-weekly emails. These emails are packed with nutrition, mindfulness, training and recovery information.

I actually subscribed not only to the “paid” WAG, but using another name and email (soooo sneeeeaky…) I also subscribed to their free offer on their website. It’s called the WAG Guide to Nutrition. While the free one is – of course! – going to try to get you to sign up, it’s not as annoying as SO MANY others. It has great info, videos, and is a quality product. If you’re at all intrigued to see how WAG has changed, you can try it out that way. (“Try before you buy.”)

*WAG pays attention to you, and cares how you’re doing. Two years ago when I did WAG, I actually stopped logging, just to see what would happen. Nothing happened. My coach didn’t contact me, WAG HQ didn’t contact me. Nothing. The Intake Form, in fact, used to point out that it was “up to you to check in and keep track.” I felt that I was paying V.I.P. prices and being ignored. Now, WAG has somehow changed their back end so that your coach is notified if you stop logging – not only that, but HQ has “Happiness Engineers” (I think that’s what they’re called) that will check in on you if you go Radio Silent. THIS IS HUGE! My new CrossFit gym does the same thing – if you haven’t checked in for a while, you get a “Hey, everything okay?” email. Even if it’s just an automated response, it’s better than hearing crickets.

*My coach is paired to me to a T. Before, my WAG coach really didn’t “get me.” She even sent me exasperated emails for being too curious . . . too long-winded . . . too “me”! She was about 30 years my junior, because I checked her out on Instagram. I probably would have dealt with an old 50-something the way she did, when I was a 20-something. But this time around, WAG has a far more robust “intake process,” which drills down and can therefore make a much more specific match. They’ve completely updated and revamped the Intake Questionnaire. Instead of making you categorize yourself into an “athlete” or “non-athlete” (as those of you stalwart readers probably recall, this sent me through the roof), it asks you to describe your motivation for joining WAG (letting you choose more than one). What you choose then leads you to drill-down questions, that ultimately match you to the right coach. Genius.

They even have questions that ask you how much of a “high touch” experience you’re looking for. I have a “virtual coach” headset/app that does a similar thing – you can set her “chattiness” level to fit your desires. By asking questions about this at the outset in their Questionnaire, WAG HQ can understand your expectations and tailor the experience to them.

WAG is like a new entity. It checks all the right boxes. But that’s not why I sat down to blog today.

Today, I sat down to try to convince you Omegas out there to Speak Up!

Let me explain.

I have a tendency to let things “fester” until I’m done. Then, I quit.

I did this with the last relationship I had before my current one. Things had gone sideways, but I didn’t say anything. Once my partner realized that things were really “wrong” and wanted to “right the ship” (go to counselling, make lifestyle changes, whatever), it was far too late. I’d checked out.

Last year, I even gave up The Crossfit for a while.

I had had issues with some things at my last gym, but just let it go. Frankly, I felt that they should notice that things were off. But, of course, they didn’t. Like WAG 1.0, I felt that, since I was paying premium $, someone should be giving me premium attention. Finally, after running a training there to get my Concept 2 certification, I felt so disrespected that I came to realize that I’d reached that point . . . things were just too sideways to fix. So I stopped showing up.

The lucky thing here, though, is that after about six months without The Crossfit, I wondered if maybe – just maybe – it was the situation that needed to be discarded – not The Crossfit. I tentatively decided to try out a new gym. In fact, it was a gym near my house that had allowed me to come in and teach the second Concept 2 class I needed for my certification. I had to teach the exact same class, sending both videos to Concept 2 HQ. The same curriculum, the same playlist, the same cues. Comparing the two, my judges commented that some members of the first class “just hadn’t listened to” me. Who was in that class? The first gym’s staff. Hm.

This new gym is not only closer to my house (by easily 20 minutes), cheaper (by about $100 a month), but it also has little “touches” (like a P.R. bell) that make things fun.

I’d given up on The Crossfit, because I was in the wrong gym.

A good friend of mine (who had talked me into doing WAG two years ago, in fact) had been suggesting I try another gym in the area for a while. But I felt that meant being “disloyal.” So what’d I do? I quit doing Crossfit altogether. Um – what?

So what does that mean – what do I want you to take away from all this rambling?

Believe in your gut. If it says leave – leave.

You know what? After I left my former gym, I didn’t even hear anything from them again. My current gym sent me a “Hey, you okay?” notice when my husband and I were on vacation for 10 days. I’d only been with this gym for a few months. I was at my old gym for 4 years. I quit going – nothing. Hm.

When I was having a “personality clash” with my WAG Coach, my same friend told me to just ask for a different coach.

I instead figured that “all the coaches” would be like this coach (e.g., “all gyms are like this gym”) and so I rejected “The WAG” (“The Crossfit”) altogether.

This passive aggressive tendency is disconcerting.

I want people to realize when something is wrong – I don’t want to have to tell them.

I hate confrontation. Some folks love it (litigators do, obviously!) I’d rather just give up rather than confront. Crazy, right? I know. I know. Crazy.

I often don’t even realize that I’m doing it. When I do, though, I will try to fix it. And it’s scary! I mean, what if the person laughs at me? Doesn’t listen? Gets mad?

I discussed this once on Girls Gone WOD Podcast. I had brought one of the podcasters a gift – my beef jerky. She hadn’t tried it, and in fact, was going to give it to a mutual friend. I had a mini-fit, stating that I’d brought it for her to try, and I wanted her to try it before she gave it away. She had no problem doing that – in fact, she had no realization that this was important to me. She tried it, loved it, gave the rest away to our mutual friend, and I was happy.

Had I not mentioned it, I would have had this very silly, passive aggressive, wounded “memory” that my friend had “rejected” my gift, then given it away. Dumb, right?

But we do this all the time. (Well, we Omegas do.)

Don’t let things go too sideways before you address them.

It might be icky in the moment – but way better in the long run. Instead of giving up The Crossfit for six months once I came to realize my gym wasn’t working for me, I should have jumped right over to the gym I’m at now. I shouldn’t have thrown the baby out with the bathwater, as the saying goes. Instead of just quitting WAG 2 years ago, I probably should have asked for a different coach.

Maybe I should have brought up my issues with my old gym. But then again – I’d be driving 20 minutes each way longer, and paying $100 more a month if I had . . . so maybe not 😉 Similarly, the changes that have occurred in WAG in the ensuing two years have made it a dramatically better program. Who knows?

Things happen for a reason. Just be sure that you remember that you can Stand Up and Speak Up – even if your voice shakes! I believe in you. If something is skidding sideways, don’t let things fester until it’s too late. And if you’re sticking it out, saying nothing, don’t kid yourself. Don’t call your fear – of being laughed at, of being ignored, of being argued with, of change – Loyalty. Loyalty and sticking with things through the tough times is great. Working on things is great. But sticking with things because you don’t want to confront what’s not working is not so great.

On that note, I’d like to add that, a month in on WAG 2.0, I am actually drinking pretty close to 80 oz. of water a day (this is a HUGE change for me!), I put my jeans in the dryer this morning for the first time in – oh – a year?, and I know I will stick with it until I have reached the results I want (even if it takes over 3 months), because my coach is SPECTACULARLY PERFECT. In my Intake Form, I was willing to address what had not worked for me before. To be brutally honest. And in doing so, everything changed. But, not to pat myself too hard on the back, I had also been willing to give it another try.

I’ve been asked to be an expert on an international webinar in a few weeks, and I’m going to call this situation out by name. I was asked as a coach, to speak about coaching, which I will, but I’m also going to talk about having the right coach and use this situation as an example.

Oh, AND . . . at my new gym, I’ve been able to ring that P.R. bell not once – not twice – but three times in the past month.

Be Brave. Stand Up. Speak Up.

Even if your voice shakes.

WAG 2.0 – What a difference 2 years makes . . .

Posted on March 7, 2018January 17, 2026 by Sandy

Wait – what? WAG?

As most of you know, about 2 years ago, I gave WAG (“Working Against Gravity”) a try. At a 10,000 ft. level, it’s a coached, macro-based, eating plan. (If you don’t know what a “Macro” is, go HERE and skip down to “Whatsa Macro?”)

For those of you who are new here, the Reader’s Digest version (wow, now you know I’m old . . . ) is that I have tried various eating plans over the last decade or so.

All my life, I had been “lucky enough” to have been basically a skinny thang. “Scarecrow” and “Beanpole” were a few of my nicknames growing up – at six feet tall in 8th grade and about 130 pounds soaking wet, you get the idea. I wasn’t athletic, lolled around reading books, ate without thinking and – Beanpole.

Unfortunately, when I hit the “hormone slide towards menopause” a little while ago, the pounds just poured on. I burned candles at all the temples of all the Diet Gods and Goddesses I’d blithely walked past my entire life. I watched my waistline disappear. I made penance for every thought I had ever had over the decades as a cheerfully ignorant skinny thang, when I just “didn’t understand” why folks had weight issues. More pounds. And more. And more.

Oh my. Oh my oh my.

As I mentioned, one of the eating plans that I tried was called Working Against Gravity (“WAG”). A number of friends and Crossfit community folks had tried it with great success. WAG is not inexpensive – it’s about $160 a month, and you’re required to sign up for three months. But, believe me, after hearing that it was The Thing, I just handed over my credit card.

As you can see if you read my post from 2 years ago (no obligation), it didn’t work for me. I got off on the wrong foot with WAG from the outset with their intake form, my coach just didn’t seem to “get” me, and I basically gave up. (And no one even noticed.) I was really sad.

Recently, however, I heard that WAG had made a lot of changes in the ensuing two years.

In the interim, I have “eating plan’d” myself silly. (As you know if you follow my blog.) I have had programs with a coach, tried programs without a coach, read every book, listened to every TED talk. Seen doctors. Seen acupuncturists. Seen bodyworkers. Seen fitness consultants. About six months or so ago, I quite literally gave up. I stopped doing Crossfit, I started listening to my dear husband . . . who thinks “I’m fine” and should “do age-appropriate things.” He said just buy bigger clothes, jiggle here and there, and . . . give in.

My naturopath said to let things settle, get bloodwork done, get my DNA parsed to uncover what sort of genetic stuff was going on with me. In the six months I took “off,” I didn’t gain any weight, though my DNA and personalized nutrition stated that – hello – I was overfat. I tried not to care.

And then?

Hubby got some bad bloodwork results – and Mama Bear left the pity party and got back into action.

I went back through everything that I know about nutrition, macros, you name it. I read deeply about what I could do to reverse some of the issues. And I started to imagine that, perhaps, if I got back in gear and found a way to lose the 30 pounds that has to go, he would be motivated to do it, too.

Not only that, but in my secret heart of hearts, I realized that if I lost 30 pounds, given that I use a 30 pound band to “lift myself” in pullups, I might actually garner my unicorn horn desire – to be able to do pullups again. (It’s been since I was in the Marines – yeah – don’t even ask how long ago that was!)

So, I’m back trying WAG out again.

As I mentioned, I’d heard that WAG had dramatically changed since I had tried it out. I was a little skeptical – okay, I was a lot skeptical. So I poked around. In poking, I found a testimonial from someone who sounded a lot like me.

Part of my issue with WAG the first time around is it seemed “geared” towards young folks who were competitive athletes. I ain’t young, and I ain’t competitive. Finding that testimonial – and a video that showed some of the WAG coaches at a retreat – made me wonder if WAG had maybe “grown up a bit” from the original email, spreadsheet, and photo days.

So, I dove in.

Right from the start, the experience was really different. The intake was a lot more thoughtful, and asked me about me – it didn’t try to “pigeon-hole” me. That also made me think a lot about what I was looking for, especially in a coach. In my previous experience, I was assigned a coach who didn’t really work for me – but this new questionnaire made me think about what I was looking for in a coach.

I wanted someone who understood what it was like to be more than a couple of decades into this Game Called Life. I wanted someone who would realize that I’m trying to be athletic and functional, even if I’m not competitive and competing. I wanted someone who would be a “nutrition nerd” (Yes, I said that), because I am. I wanted someone who would help me make this work.

The first thing that they have you do is input your photographs though – before getting into that juicy Questionnaire. This makes sense, since it’s the thing that you don’t really want to do.

I recently found a photograph of myself just a few years ago, in a bathing suit I still have. I took my WAG Intake photo in that bathing suit. I cried.

When the first photo was taken of me, I wasn’t even really working out much. (Some swimming.) I didn’t watch what I ate that much. Now? I work out “the right way” (none of this “treadmill, burn-out-your-adrenals” stuff for moi), I eat “the right way” and – what happened to my waist?? I have no waist. In fact, my waist measurement is now what my hip measurement was in the previous photo. OK, 1/4 inch less. But seriously.

My Questionnaire was reviewed, and I was assigned a coach. Then I did precisely what pissed my first coach off immediately – I asked 10 (okay, 4) questions, all about an hour apart from one another.

What happened?

She answered them.

No fuss, no muss. “That’s what I’m here for,” she said.

PLAY HERE. Nope, not Crickets. 😉

Now for another really great part. WAG integrates with My Fitness Pal.

In WAG, you’re required to log your macros, and weigh yourself, daily. When I did it before, this meant filling out an Excel spreadsheet. Now, they have a shiny new interface, called “Seismic.” Nope, no more emails and logging in a spreadsheet. Hallelujah! (Go back and play that sound clip again 😉 ) If you’re already familiar with My Fitness Pal (which you know that I am), this change is, well . . . seismic! I have been using My Fitness Pal for so long, that the MFP folks (now owned by Under Armor) actually invited me to their headquarters a year or so ago, to give them feedback on MFP and beta test some potential new features. Yup, I’m MFP O.G. 😉 The best part about My Fitness Pal is that it’s basically a crowdsourced database of just about every food you can think of. Once another user has scanned or entered that food into MFP, it’s there for everyone to use. Better yet, you can input your Recipes into MFP, and it will give you the exact macros for them. You can even save Meals, if you tend to eat the same thing time and again. Genius!

Since WAG now integrates with MFP, the weighing and “macro logging” that you need to do each day is a piece of cake. Not only that, but Seismic is actually pretty fun to use. I’m a sucker for “silly things” coming up while the website is loading, and Seismic is a champ at this. I know, that makes me like 4 years old – but hey, for someone like me, it actually makes you poke around on the website, to see what Seismic is going to say back to you.

WAG also now has a very deep and detailed Knowledge Base. I haven’t read all of it yet – but the fact it exists makes me exceptionally happy. One of my issues before was that there just didn’t seem to be much of a “there there” – the only “rich” part of the experience involved their Members-Only Facebook page, and while that’s great, those are other folks paying to be there, just like me. I wanted a ton of knowledge, and I wanted a coach who “got” me.

It seems that, in 2 years, my prayers have been answered.

I’ve only been on WAG for a week. (I just had my first check in.) I have gone from just under 190 lbs. to just over 186 during this time. This isn’t particularly unusual for me – usually I will get about 9 pounds down in an Eating Plan (a/k/a Diet) and then things don’t budge, and I give up. But so far, for a week, I’ve been working the plan. And perhaps most importantly, I have been enjoying everything. The website is great. Logging is easy peasy. My coach is a unicorn riding baby angel of nerdy pre-menopausal Virgo joy.

Fingers crossed . . .

Travel Tips – 20 quick trip tips you might not have thought of

Posted on March 3, 2018June 13, 2026 by Sandy

The section of my book entitled “Preparing for Paris” gives you a LOT of suggestions (flip to page 69 if you have it on your shelf). However, in the 11 years since I wrote that book (and 8 since the Companion Playbook!), I have come up with a few more suggestions to help with everything from preparing to go to being safe on a trip.

I won’t repeat the suggestions found in my book here. They include being sure your passport runs at least six months “past” your return date (required by some countries), to having a “mail stop” form filled out and on your refrigerator in case you decide to up and go on a whim, to already having plants and lights on timers, to putting together a “go bag” of toiletries (with a list of your meds/anything you need to add before you run out the door). I also detail how to set up your closet so that you can pack quickly and efficiently.

As a sidebar – I’d like to mention some shoes that I used on a recent trip. They are by Mime et Moi, and they are not inexpensive. (I was lucky enough to get two pair, with 4 interchangeable heels a piece, on Kickstarter). However, they’re genius – one “shoe” base to which you can add different heels. If you pack black-based clothing for your trip, here are all the shoes you may need, from knocking around town to going to the Opera.

So, how about those tips? Well, here we go! In no particular order . . .

1. Use www.checkmytrip.com as a travel resource.
If you’re travelling on miles with a companion who is not, use your miles for your companion’s ticket. That way you will still accrue miles on that trip.
Take a photo of all your documents, driver’s license, credit cards, itinerary, boarding pass, etc. and email it to yourself, trusted neighbors, and the like. (We use a specific Gmail address for this purpose, and this purpose only – it also contains a document with our passwords, just in case.) If anything gets stolen, you can pull it up at an “Internet cafe.” Put a copy of your itinerary at the top of your suitcase as well, in case your luggage is lost. I recently ordered a little “luggage tag” that you can insert your itinerary into, so it’s on the outside of the bag. My dad, a veteran traveler, uses this and I think it’s genius. (Typing up this post just reminded me to get one!)
Make a list of everything in your luggage. If you check your bag and (horrors!) it doesn’t show up, you can quickly and efficiently list things out for your insurance company. It’s not a bad idea to actually take a photo of everything laid out on your bed before you pack – this and the list can also be sent to yourself in your email. Do keep a “hard copy” list in your carry-on, though, in case you need to make an immediate claim at the airport. Also, of course, be sure to have a list of all your medications. Snapshots of the fronts of bottles, also saved to your email, are quick and easy. It probably goes without saying that if you’re going to be gone for a while, get a checkup and go to the dentist before you go – better to find out here, than there! And while you’re at the dentist, stock up on an extra toothbrush (if you drop yours abroad, you’ll be glad to have an extra!), dental floss (see below), etc. Be sure to throw away your toothbrush at the end of the trip!
Tell your bank, phone, and credit card companies that you’ll be away. Check their procedures. While American Express never seems to have this issue, I have had trouble using my credit card outside my local area (especially in Vegas). Since you really want to slim your wallet down to the bare essentials while traveling, it shouldn’t be a problem to alert the one or two companies whose “plastic” you’re carrying. (NOTE: My husband and I have found a couple of times that one or the other of our ATM “networks” won’t work in a given area. As such, be sure if you are bringing a Visa/ATM or Mastercard/ATM combo card, that you bring at least 2 different “networks.” But leave any extraneous cards at home! If you belong to clubs that you might visit along the way – Elks, reciprocal yacht clubs, golf clubs, or the like – then have your club write a note of introduction for you before you go, then just bring a copy of your card.)
Pack multi-use/useful items. Wrap Duct tape around a pencil (then you have both in a pinch). Always have toilet paper (take the cardboard roll out, squash it down). Ziplocs are useful – as are “throw away” plastic bags (e.g., the kind you might use for vegetables at the grocery) in case your shoes get muddy. Thick socks can be slippers. An ace bandage can be used for many things, as can dental floss (you can even hang laundry from it in a pinch!) If you use a non-toxic deodorant (for example, think a Crystal), you can rub it on your face/forehead/upper lip in a hot climate. Dryer sheets can be used to fend off mosquitoes and bedbugs (though if you’re really worried, bring a silk sleep-bag). The lowly bandana can be used as a headband, a belt, a napkin, a seat cover, a gift ( 🙂 ), a cold compress, a tourniquet, or a pillow cover. A string grocery bag (they stretch to amazing sizes!) is never a bad idea, and having a pretty, thin sarong can do duty as a hair and arm cover in a mosque/church, a beach cover up, a tote, a picnic blanket, etc. Since you want to pack as little as possible, that same sarong can jazz up an outfit. Though it seems crazy – always bring a swimsuit. The one time you forget will be the time there are hot springs to visit! (You’ll have your sarong to dry off!)
Iron your paper money. This is going to sound CRAZY, but a number of countries won’t accept “battered” money. In fact, when we were in Peru, we wound up purchasing a beautiful work of art from natives on a tiny island in Lake Titicaca . . . for $35 instead of $50 – because we had a pristine $20, $10 and $5, but couldn’t “make up” a perfect $50. Really! We even tried to “make him” take the extra $15 and he wouldn’t. If you are going to bring cash, make sure it has no “nicks,” and then iron it (it also takes less room in your wallet that way). Always be sure to have small bills and coins in your pockets while travelling, too – you are likely to need them in restrooms, many of which have either attendants to tip, or coin-locked doors.
If you’re going on a tour-guided trip (or cruise), set up the tips that you will need in advance, put them in separate envelopes, and forget about them. You don’t want to get caught short at the end.
If the water isn’t safe to drink, beware! Remember things like showering with your back to the shower (so you don’t aspirate the water – suck on a candy to help you remember!), use bottled water on your toothbrush, and remember that glasses are often just “wiped out” – not sterilized. In many countries it’s required as a point of hospitality to drink a glass of mint tea – if you bring a short straw, you at least aren’t putting your lips to the glass.
Eat at the bar. If you’re traveling alone, eat at the bar. You can read a book there if you want, but you can also chat with the bartender. You’re less of a “mark” if you’re eating at the bar and look like you might just be “waiting for your husband” than if you’re sitting at a table with only one setting. It’s never a bad idea to tip the bartender beforehand to take care of you. And – obviously – don’t drink too much, and be sure to watch your drink like a hawk. You just never know who might have something “special” to slip into it for you. While out, try to keep your purse either in your lap, or behind your back in a chair. Never sling it over the chair or put it underneath.
Speaking of tips – if you are staying at a hotel for a few days, be sure to leave a couple dollars for the housekeeping staff every day on your bed. The staff rotates – leaving a bunch at the end of your stay will only go to that day’s staff. Moreover, the staff tends to take better care of you if you tip while you’re still there – we have had extra “amenities” show up after doing this for a couple of days (e.g., “high roller” toiletry kits when in Vegas, etc.)
Use pantiliners, if you’re a woman. They’re small, and especially on a hot or long travel day, you can just swap them out without fuss.
Shampoo is nearly always available, but I always bring conditioner. Not all conditioner will “tame my locks.” That said, you can concentrate shampoo or conditioner by pouring it on a throw-away pie plate and putting it into a low temperature oven for a few hours. The water will evaporate, leaving a thick liquid you can pour into travel-sized bottles. (Use a funnel – otherwise it’s a mess 😉 ) This way just a few drops will “blossom into” a full handful of shampoo/conditioner and less “volume” will last weeks longer.
Pick up the concierge’s business card – or even a matchbook – from your hotel. That way if you get lost, you can hand it to a taxi driver and get back! In Venice, almost all stores have cards that show “how to get there” from a tourist area (e.g., “start at the cathedral, then . . . “). If you are even considering returning to purchase an item, be sure to get a card. If they are shipping an item for you, be sure to make a big deal out of taking a photo of what you are purchasing, the people selling it to you, etc. Then get their email and make a point of emailing the photo to them immediately. This acts as insurance against the box arriving with something completely different in it! A final note about Venice – as long as you don’t cross a bridge, if you get lost, just keep wandering. You haven’t left the island . . . you’re bound to find your way back 😉 And trust me – you’ll get lost 😉
Protecting yourself might seem fairly obvious. Don’t wear flashy jewelry (even costume!) – but do wear a wedding ring to fend off the sharks. Leave your “real band” at home though – you’d be heartbroken if it was stolen. Keep money on different parts of your body, so you don’t pull it all out at once. Don’t let a receptionist at a hotel “announce” your room number. Ask for a room by the elevator – sounds dumb, but the more traffic, the less likely you are to get ambushed. Buy a small rubber “triangle” (often used to hold doors open in offices) to ensure your door cannot be opened from outside. Approach your door with your key in hand ready to go, then when you first walk in, block the door open with your suitcase, and look through the closet, shower, etc. – to be sure you’re alone in there – and then ensure that every single door and window actually locks. If you are given an “electronic” key, always obtain two. If one doesn’t work, you don’t have to go all the way back down to retrieve another. And – as I mentioned in my book – it’s actually often well worth the small tip to have a bellboy take your luggage up with you. You don’t need to wrestle your bags, he knows the way, and if the key doesn’t work, he is the one that needs to get another. He can also fill your ice, answer any questions, and stand bemused as you check out the shower for bad guys.
Set up an Instagram account if you don’t have one already, and save your snapped photos there. My husband has chided me about this for years – he’s a “real camera” kind of guy. Until he managed to lose it on our last trip . . . without the SIM card having been backed up. Though my photos aren’t as beautiful as his, they were (ahem) all backed up into my Instagram account. How I do it is I actually just take the photo in the Instagram app. On the posting page, for the first photo at a given site, I type in the hashtags I want to use and then “select” them all and copy. I push to “post” each photo to Insta – even if I don’t have an internet connection, they will all stay “queued up” until I do. With each subsequent photo or video at the same site, I just “paste” the hashtags on from the first photo. And as for that lost camera and SIM card – my husband now does what I have asked him to do for years – the first photo on each SIM card is a photo of a $100 bill with a note containing our name and my office address, stating that they can keep the camera, but if they return the SIM card to the address, we will Paypal them a reward. Doesn’t mean we will actually send them $100, but what are they going to do with our photos otherwise? It kills me that a SIM card with nearly a year’s worth of photos (yes, a year . . . ) was probably pitched into a dumpster after my hubby left the camera on a gondola.
Be sure you have Polarized sunglasses. You can also use them as a “polarizing filter” on your camera (even your phone camera) by holding them up to the lens. If you take a second to do it right, it works like a charm. Especially good if you’re taking photos on or near reflective water.
There are, of course, a zillion things you can do with your phone – from using it as a flashlight, to an alarm clock, to a camera, to a portable entertainment center (be sure to download – wifi might be broken!), VOIP for calls home without incurring charges (be sure to check!), currency converter, TripAdvisor for restaurants/hotels/etc. nearby, etc. One of the best things I ever did was to download an “ambient noise” app – “pink noise” blocks snoring quite well. You might consider some industrial-strength earplugs as well. One of the most important things to do with your phone is to put it down. Be sure to “live in the present moment” during your trip. A few shots here and there are great (especially 10 years later, when they can bring you right back to that moment), but we see folks taking selfie after selfie – at museums, etc. – without even “seeing” where they are. Taking shot after shot of your face with 1/2 of the Mona Lisa blurred in the background means that you’re taking those shots to “show you’re there” – which means you’re not really “there-there” as it were. Try taking a “whole day” without a selfie. Take shots of beautiful things so you can remember them when you’re a grandma – but without you in the shot. Is that hard for you? Hm.
Things that just “live” in my suitcase to be “prepared” to travel: A cord and charger for my phone, a swimsuit, a sarong, cleansing wipes, corkscrew, Swiss Army knife, hand sanitizer, sunscreen/insect repellent (2 oz.), nail clippers, mini-medical kit (Imodium, Neosporin, etc.), mending kit/safety pins (a small one from a hotel), personal lubricant (which can be used to lubricate anything), toilet paper, small umbrella, quick dry washcloth, rolled up water bottle, ziplocs, Duct tape on a pencil, and a flexible power strip. The power strip allows you to plug that in and “share” an outlet if you’re ever stranded trying to charge your phone in an airport crowded with other travelers doing the same thing – take it from one who knows! My ‘go bag’ has 2 oz. or less sizes of everything else – face/eye cream, hair brush, disposable razor, toothbrush/paste, dental floss, deodorant, eye drops, etc. (all as detailed in my book).
Finally, I would strongly suggest getting TSA-PRE. Being able to use the “TSA-PRE” Security line is a huge boon. You don’t have to take off your shoes/belt/jacket/etc., the lines are always shorter, and hey – you look like a Bond Girl as you scoot on through without disrobing. If you happen to have an American Express card, they will reimburse you for the cost – check with them for details.

What about you? What sort of tricks and tips do you have?

Make Your Mark!!

Posted on December 20, 2017January 17, 2026 by Sandy

Jobs Where Women Are Making Their Mark

Business is a man’s world, or so they say. Over the last 50 years, however, more and more women have joined the work force – in fact, some of you may not even remember a time when your Mom, or wife, or sister, didn’t work! And while the “fairer sex” (we are, aren’t we??) can sometimes have issues with finding a foothold in many industries, there are still several professions that are decidedly dominated by the (un-distressed) damsels. Careers such as dental hygienists, school teacher, and human resources manager are ones where women looking to make a living can do so without dealing with the sometimes unintentional sexual biases of men in the same capacity as some other fields.

Read on for more information about jobs where women are making their mark.

Child care services

More than 90% of all child care services workers are female. This includes caregivers, preschool teachers, and tutors. Often, these are moms looking for a full- or part-time position with flexible hours that allow them to care for their own children. However, child care facility directors are often required to have a degree in early childhood education and can bring in a salary of more than $50,000 a year.

Veterinarian

Love animals? Did you know that 80% of veterinarians and veterinary clinic workers in the United States are women!? With a projected 9% growth through 2024, veterinarians are in high demand – and rightfully so! Veterinarians are required to hold a doctorate in veterinary medicine and also to maintain up-to-date state licensure. With an annual salary inching toward $90,000, this is an exceptional career for women across the country.

Social services

Social workers bring home an average of $45,500 per year by helping people solve and cope with problems. Social workers can work in a number of different settings, including hospitals, schools, health clinics, and in private practice. Most positions require a bachelor’s degree in the field; clinical social workers must hold at least a Masters and complete a two-year stint in a supervised setting. Over the next decade, demand for social workers is expected to rise by 12%.

Education

Walk into any school in the country and it is very clear that most – 81.8% to be exact – teachers are women. This is true in both the public and private sectors. Being a teacher requires dedication and patience. However, given that most teachers receive at least part of the summer off, the average salary of around $55,000 a year is a respectable sum. Another benefit of a career in education is having the opportunity to touch thousands of lives and have a real impact on the children who need it most. We can all credit a teacher somewhere in our ‘back story’ with quite literally making us who we are.

Accountant

Earning a bachelor’s degree in accounting can lead to a $65,000 per year or more income, with lots of job security. While you will need to pass the dreaded CPA exam (similar to the Bar Exam for lawyers, where few pass on their first try), CPAs are in demand and have a projected job growth of 11% in the near future. Accountants are experts in money management and help businesses and individuals balance books and remain IRS-compliant the entire year.

Employment services

Employment service professionals, especially human resource managers, are nearly the highest paid “pink collar” work group. Human resource managers rake in an impressive $102,000 a year with a four year degree, though a Master’s is preferred in some industries. Women, being natural multitaskers, excel in human resources, where they may be responsible for handling everything from job interviews to benefits coordination.

Law

Although only 11% of police officers are women, 54% of public and private practice lawyers are female (including, of course, yours truly!). Beating out human resource managers with a yearly salary of nearly $115,000, lawyers are required to hold a law degree and to satisfactorily complete that pesky Bar Examination in any state in which they will practice.

The Department of Labor offers more in-depth information about female-dominated occupations as well as median weekly earnings here.

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Another fantastic article drafted by our correspondent, Jennifer Scott, at SpiritFinder.Org!

Image: Pixabay

Holidays Without Anxiety – Could It Be Possible?

Posted on November 30, 2017January 17, 2026 by Sandy

Why Hosting Your Own Holiday Party Is Easier Than You Think

Let’s face it—as fabulous as the holidays are, they can be the most stressful time of year. Between the chaos of travel, the highs and lows of seeing family and friends, buying presents, and everything else, this time of year can cause anxiety in even the least anxiety-prone mind. One excellent way to control your amount of stress during the holiday season is to consider hosting your own event. It may seem counter-intuitive, but there are many benefits to doing so. Here are some benefits and tips to managing your anxiety and hosting your own holiday bash.

Conflict Avoidance

Every family has history (sometimes “capital H” History!), and different personalities can clash. One benefit of hosting your own holiday events is conflict management through avoidance. If you know for certain that Aunt Sue and Uncle Joe cannot be in the same room, consider hosting two separate, small events. If you buy food in bulk and prepare things in advance or even make/buy frozen appetizers, you can easily arrange two or more parties with ease. Then you can relax knowing that those conflicts and arguments that seemed unavoidable simply won’t happen.

Spread Out the Work

It’s no secret that making a holiday meal for your whole family is an entire day of work. If you’re hosting more than one party, for any reason, the task of spending that much time in the kitchen can be daunting. A potluck-style party or even an afternoon event where your guests bring their favorite snacks can remove the pressure of slaving for hours over the stove. Another plus to sharing the load of cooking is you make sure your guests have something to eat that they will definitely enjoy. With so many dietary restrictions, popular and necessary, in this day and age, ensuring guests are happy by bringing their own food is a way to lower planning stress and to engage all your partygoers.

Drop Perfectionism

Anyone who suffers from anxiety knows that perfectionism is a thing that haunts your every waking minute, especially in stressful situations. Those who suffer from it also know that challenging these thoughts and fixations on perfection are key to overcoming them. You won’t have a perfect party because perfection doesn’t exist. Learn to let yourself off the hook; it’s okay if every room isn’t spotless. Close doors to rooms that you don’t have the energy to tidy up, and keep the lights off or put a trash can in front of the door. People will know not to go in. Decorate simply and don’t worry if your mother or grandmother or Uncle Simon decorates “better.” Simple is elegant and tasteful, and if anyone says otherwise . . . consider them uninvited next time!

Offer Festive Non-Alcoholic Options

It can be intimidating when attending a holiday party in recovery, being the “designated driver,” or even just knowing how certain relatives act when drinking. Whether you’re afraid of being singled out by an overly eager host, feeling pressured by friends or family to drink, or afraid of how your brother will act when he hits the whisky, alcohol can add unnecessary stress to any event. Hosting your own party can immediately relieve those fears. Make it clear on the invitation (whether it’s an e-mail, letter, or text) that there will be plenty of non-alcoholic drink options available. You might even consider not offering alcohol at all – or making a festive punch or eggnog that has far less alcohol than the standard. At the end of the day, recovery/safe driving is far more important than a drink at a holiday get-together. Hosting your own party could allow you to engage in holiday cheer without feeling the pressure of resisting temptation or feeling like others are walking on eggshells around you.

All in all, the notion of hosting a party might seem like a bad idea to someone with anxiety, but it can truly help to lessen stress during what should be a magical time of year. You can spread out the burden with friends and family by hosting it potluck style, make sure conflicting personalities don’t clash, and offer festive, delicious non-alcoholic drinks (whether for recovery purposes or to help keep tempers low from those around you). And by letting go of the need for perfection, you can have a holiday that is painless and maybe even fun.

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Guest blogger Jennifer Scott knows how difficult it can be to live with anxiety and depression. She has experienced both since she was in her teens. Today, she writes about the ups and downs of her mental illness on SpiritFinder.org. The blog serves as both a source of information for people with mental illness and a forum where those living with anxiety and depression can come together to discuss their experiences.

First image courtesy of Pixabay

Add The Damned Stevia . . .

Posted on May 10, 2017May 10, 2017 by Sandy

It’s the middle of Day 3 on the I-Burn.

If you don’t know what I’m talking about, you might want to catch up HERE.

Yesterday, I learned the value of dilution.

(No, you didn’t miss a blog post – I was too busy to write. Read on…)

As I have complained about before, you’re required on this eating plan to drink 1/2 of your body weight, in water, every day.

Honestly, did our caveperson forebears drink like this? I think not.

Every single diet plan on God’s green Earth seems to want you to drink gallons of water. Frankly, I don’t get it. We can’t be “built” to drink this much water.

I guess the idea here is that we’re also not built to be drinking wine, and eating Twinkies and Kentucky Fried Chicken.

As such, we have to dilute the toxins we shove in our mouths with as much water as possible. So, our caveperson forebears would drink like normal people, because they were eating the way we’re s’posed to be eating. We have to drink like camels, because we eat and drink stuff our body doesn’t know what to do with, and this is the only way to get rid of it.

Doesn’t mean I have to like it . . .

But back to dilution.

Day 1, I didn’t quite make it through all the water I was supposed to drink. As such, on Day 2, I figured I’d add it to the smoothie and the tea.

Genius!

This made the smoothie far more palatable – though it does mean that you now have basically a pitcher of smoothie v. a cup. (All the ingredients wouldn’t fit in even the largest cup of my smoothie maker anyway, so this just turns what was about 1-1/2 large smoothie-maker cups into a pitcher.)

This also makes the tea a bit more palatable. Yay!

Yesterday, I also learned the value of stirring.

If you read my Day 1 rant, you’ll know that the “tea” is really basically lemon oil. Well . . . what do they say about oil and water?

Duh!

Oil floats on water.

So the tea that I drank on Day 1 (especially Morning 1, Day 1) came right off the top of the pitcher in my fridge. As such, I think that it was basically all lemon oil. On Day 2, when it seemed like I was “getting used to” the tea, I actually had a lightbulb moment and realized that it was just that there was less and less of the oil in it.

Stir the Damned Tea before you Drink It.

Lesson learned.

Today, I learned the value of stevia.

You’re allowed to “sweeten” the tea and the smoothie – I just didn’t think that it would do that much good. This morning, I decided “What the heck, I gotta do something here,” and added stevia to the smoothie.

The smoothie is made up of raw cranberries, raw limes, blueberries, kale, walnuts, avocado, and cucumber. Sour-acid-nasty.

Add stevia? It kinda tastes like a cran-lime margarita.

I don’t know why I didn’t do this immediately upon tasting the cran-lime battery acid on Day 1. Probably because, in the book, she says “Well, if you really want to, hey, you could add a bit of stevia…” – so I didn’t think it would make that much of a difference. Duh!

What does this mean?

I had my pitcher of smoothie today and didn’t hate it.

Ok – I actually liked it. WHAT? Yeah, it wasn’t bad. Sure, there was a good load of stevia in there, but it’s straight stevia leaf, which is allowed. My lord, why didn’t I figure this out before the final day?

As an added bonus, of course, I’ve drunk a big lot of the water I’m supposed to be drinking, because I diluted things, as learned on Day 2.

I have a TON of the soup left.

Pomroy says in the book that the recipe makes a lot of soup – and it does. I actually fed some to my hubby last night, and he said that it was pretty good. (Granted I did drizzle his with truffle oil.) I drank more of it yesterday than I did on Day 1, because I was a lot hungrier than on Day 1, and the soup is a “free” food.

Of course, it’s a free food made up of a ton of root veggies, which make me, as they say in England, “windy.” Not smelly, just windy. (TMI?) I actually looked up the ins and outs of loud, soft, smelly, not smelly on Google – it’s fascinating (generally has to do with fermenting carbohydrates) – but I’ll let you do that research yourself 😉

Tonight we have to meet with someone, and that means we are likely to go out to dinner after. I guess I will do my best – probably meaning just get veggies. And then, we’re done! Not quite sure what we’re moving to on Monday – my guess will be the Pomroy Fast Metabolism Diet. I did have some success on that one before, I just got bored and quit.

So, any changes, as I’m in the middle of Day 3?

*My daughter has found her rings are really spinning on her fingers (a sign that inflammation is down)

I haven’t lost any scale weight. I know, I know, you’re supposed to stay off it for the 3 days, but the dang machine is there staring me in the face. On the plus side (I did NOT say “plus size”…), my daughter has lost 3.5 pounds and my son-in-law 4, and they’re dutifully drinking all their water, so I tend to think it’s not* “just water weight.”

*My rosacea is non-existent. That doesn’t surprise me, of course, as I actually know that it’s a by-product of inflammation. But it’s quite nice to have white skin and not red blotches on my face.

*I’m really hungry. You’re supposed to eat “as much” of the soup, tea (!!), celery, cucumbers, jicama, limes or lemons as you want. The thing is – that these are basically just water. And they sit in my stomach like water. I feel bloated, and not “sated.” So – I’m hungry.

Acid, with a side of Death, please? Haylie Pomroy The Burn

Posted on May 8, 2017 by Sandy

Yeah yeah yeah. Me again. Trying to lose weight again. What’s new?

Well THIS time, my family is going to do it with me. (Well, that’s what we thought. Read on…)

In texting this weekend about what we could possibly “do” to lose the stupid weight we’d both gained, my daughter and I talked through a bunch of plans.

The nutritionist at my daughter’s gym uses Haylie Pomroy’s “Fast Metabolism Diet.”

As we texted about it, I realized that it sounded familiar. So I went to my stuffed “diet and exercise” bookshelf (four huge shelves!) and looked through it. Yup! I have tried that diet – oh, I mean “eating plan” – a few times! Not only that, I blogged about it HERE and HERE and HERE . (The second link actually talks you through that plan in detail.)

My issue with dieting is always that no one is doing it with me, so I get bored, and quit.

(I talked about that, in fact, in the first blog post linked above.)

I had one copy of the Fast Metabolism Diet book but, for some reason, I happened to have two copies of her “micro-repair” follow-on book, The Burn.

It has a 3 day plan, a 5 day plan, and a 10 day plan. They state that you are likely to lose 3, 5, or 10 pounds on them.

These plans are centered around dealing with a certain issue for why your “scale is stuck” – the 3 day plan is the I-Plan for “Inflammation,” the 5-day is the D-Plan for “Digestion,” and the 10-day plan is the H-Plan for “Hormonal Regulation.”

The 3-Day plan appealed to me as a “Jump Start.” I Priority Mailed the 2nd copy to my daughter and texted her that it was on its way.

We decided to go on the I-Plan (the 3 day plan).

The thought was that we could do it Monday (today) through Wednesday, then we could pay attention to what we were eating and not go wild from Thursday through Sunday (Mother’s Day), then perhaps start one of the other plans from The Burn – or even jump to the 30 day Fast Metabolism Diet plan – next Monday.

Yesterday was “grocery and prep day.”

One thing I do like about Pomroy’s books is she gives you grocery lists for everything that’s on the plan you’re about to embark on. You can take a picture of it on your phone and just go buy the stuff. She also talks about how to prep, and also has some “Success Boosters” that you are to add to each day.

I actually like prepping. My daughter and her husband are in Utah, and I texted to find out how the shopping was going. Though they thought they’d have trouble finding watermelon, turns out they couldn’t find cranberries, not even in the freezer section of a number of stores that they frequented.

My issue was celery seed! I went to 4 stores and finally found one TINY package of it. You need 3 Tablespoons – this was 2. I did have some celery

seed in the upper reaches of my pantry probably circa the last millennium – but I figured that 2T of the “good/new stuff” and 1T of this wouldn’t be so bad.

You have to prep (at least) three things – a tea, a soup, and a smoothie.

Now – Pomroy tells you to “make the smoothie every morning fresh.” But, come on. You’re supposed to drink it within 30 minutes of waking up, and in my daughter’s household, that involves wrangling kids, getting lunches ready, being sure homework was really done, not to mention waking up yourself, dressing, makeup, etc.

The recipe calls for (among other things) peeled limes, which isn’t an easy task at 0-dark-00. Knife. Bleary morning eyes. Slippery citrus. Um, nope.

So I made “baggies” that contained the makings of the smoothie, already parceled out. In one bag, I put the cranberries, blueberries, and kale (my “Success Booster”), in the other bag I put the walnuts, cucumber, peeled limes, and avocado.

all these ingredients look so…unassuming…

As for the tea, it’s made up of a ton of lemons that you squeeze into the water and then throw in, boil, and let steep. There’s herbs in there too (the aforementioned celery seed, plus dried parsley and cayenne) – and I was able to find dandelion leaf at the bulk food counter, so I also included that (another “Success Booster”).

The soup is mainly root vegetables and mushrooms – there are 2 different kinds of mushrooms, sweet potatoes, carrots, celery, parsley, then 2 “other” root vegetables (I used a rutabaga and a turnip), plus a few other things. You can also add beet greens (another “Success Booster”), so I threw those in there too. You bring it to a boil then simmer it for like 2 hours, ultimately putting it through a high-powered blender to make the soup.

Tea ingredients a/k/a “death in a pan.” You can just see the evil starting to seep in.

I suppose I should have had an inkling of what was to come when my husband came in and said “It smells like skunk in here.”

I had the kitchen fan on High, but he was right – the kitchen definitely had an “interesting” smell. He chuckled, and said he was so glad he wasn’t getting roped into doing this.

A while back – geez, has to be over 10 years ago – we did a cleanse that involved pulverizing raw beets into a smoothie. He has never looked at a beet since.

Everything was merrily cooking away, and I got to work prepping for our actual dinner (read: The Last Supper). As I was chopping, my husband came back in, held his nose with his fingers, and said (cue Austrian accent): “Oh my God no! It smells like ass in here now!”

I was texting these “peanut gallery comments” to my daughter, and they were dealing with the same smells on their end. We just couldn’t stop laughing in our texts. Yeah, well it turns out, joke’s on US! . . .

As of 9:00 last night, I texted my girl, “Fingers crossed this starts us on a good path!” She texted back, “It’s gonna be great!”

Oh my lord in Heaven. Joke’s SO on us . . .

And then, it was Monday. Time to get started.

I dumped the smoothie baggies into my high speed Ninja thang, and got it a-whirlin’. It didn’t look all that bad, so I took a cautious sip. HOLY COWS! It was SO limey! I mean, limey beyond all limes. Battery acid with a hint of lime.

As I was putting my tea into the microwave, I texted my daughter and asking how it was going for them. (You start out with the smoothie and the tea.)

She texted back: “For the love of all that is holy, that tea is the worst thing ever. Like drinking acid. I wanted to die!!! And the smoothie wasn’t much better.”

By this time, I’d gotten my tea out of the microwave. The oddest part was that, in pouring it into the cup, it seemed almost…?gelatinous? Well – definitely “thicker” than tea normally is. As I took a cautious sip, I realized why.

As I mentioned above, to make the tea for the 3 days, you squeeze the lemon juice into the water from like 10 lemons, and then you actually throw the lemons into the water and boil. Then let it steep for a couple hours. With those skins/rinds in there.

The lemon oil “steeps out” of the skins and into the water. So that’s why the “tea” seems “viscous” (I just typed “vicious” – yeah, that too) – because it’s full of the lemon oil.

ass soup. pulverized. such an appealing color and fragrance.

I think that drinking Pledge would be more tasty.

Their smoothies were much more “cucumber-tasting” than mine – well, either that, or I just don’t mind that flavor as much as I do lime. Within an hour, I had a text that said my son-in-law had barely made it to work before the diarrhea started.

We kidded a bit about how “cleansing” that was, but within another hour, we had another text from my son-in-law:

“I have the perfect disclaimer for the book. ‘In order for this program to work, you must stay home for the amount of days for your preferred plan. This way you can stay in the bathroom the full time, shitting your brains out.'”

Three hours passed, and I’m still working on the smoothie.

I had diluted it with water – you’re supposed to drink 1/2 your body weight in ounces of water, daily – but it tasted so much like lime battery acid that I couldn’t get it down any quicker.

Another hour, and my son-in-law texted that he was out. There was no way that he could be this sick and work.

The mid-morning snack was a pear – which was good – and you’re “allowed” to “drink as much of the tea and soup as you want.” I hadn’t tried the soup yet, but drinking the tea is like a special torture invented to get people to spill their guts. (Um, literally.) “I’ll tell you anything, just no more TEA!”

My daughter, being ahead of me a few hours, texted that the “ass soup” actually tasted pretty good. She was at work, but luckily hadn’t had the same issue as her husband . . . I was at home, but was worried I might start having the issue, as lunch called for a spinach-based salad, and spinach sprints through my digestive tract.

At about this time, I realized that the only water I’d had was the water I used to dilute the smoothie.

I knew I would be rowing later in the day, which would help me catch up – but going from basically zero to 5 Nalgene bottles in a day is a TON of water. Drinking too much water makes me barf – so I have to be careful about it. There are tricks to it, of course – I’ve blogged about it a number of times, probably the best one being HERE. I’m not a good water drinker.

Just as I was picking up my phone to text that I was behind on my water and was afraid re. the spinach, I got a text from my daughter:

We really are the picture of loveliness . . . I just threw up the tea I forced myself to drink.

I couldn’t stop laughing.

I had to be careful though because if I laughed while drinking the tea, I was afraid it might burn a hole in my sinuses, or I might spit it out, and then it would burn through my desk, and the floor, and . . .

Another hour rolls around, and it’s time for lunch.

More tea. “Drink all you want,” says Pomroy. Who obviously has a sadistic streak.

I grumbled about it to my daughter, who texted back: Just chug it like you are a frat boy. Mind you, then you will puke it up, but it’ll be done.

Mid-afternoon snack – watermelon.

That’s actually a great snack, I like watermelon. Even better, my dog LOVES watermelon, so I parceled out some for him, too.

As an experiment, I put the soup bowl, the cup with some of the tea in it, and the smoothie glass on the floor to see what my dog thought.

He liked the soup.

He sniffed at the tea and didn’t even try.

But he licked the smoothie glass, snorted, then pulled his tongue in and out of his mouth while trying to wipe it with his paws. I nearly fell over laughing. Yeah buddy, I’m with ya!

And that’s where we are, as I type this blog. Dinner is to come – it’s based around roasted vegetables and fish (to which I am allergic, so I will have ground turkey). I can feed my husband the roasted vegetables, but I have to make him a steak or he will divorce me. 🙂 Dinner also comes with more soup and – surprise! – Tea. I might be willing to give up state secrets after another cup.

But at the end of today we will be 1/3 over . . . and in 3 days, we will certainly have a story to tell!

Unsubscribing Week

Posted on April 26, 2017April 26, 2017 by Sandy

I’ve talked about this before – HERE is the link. It goes a lot more into Unsubscribing, and talks about one of my favorite all-time lifesavers, FollowUpThen.com.

I often feel “guilty” unsubscribing.

Unsubscribing is the ultimate “I should…” exercise. I “should” be reading this stuff. I “should” find time to follow up on this. Blah-ti-blah.

My friends & client, Girls Gone WOD(r) Podcast, is living a “Year of Less.”

I’ve been behind on listening to their podcast (as in, I’m like 7 weeks behind – argh). I was able to listen today while walking the dog though, and they were revisiting the whole “Year of Less/Keep It Simple” idea.

(The reason that I haven’t been able to listen to any podcasts is because I’m in a book club, and I’m listening to the book (via Audible) while I’m “doing things” like walking the dog, prepping food, etc. that would normally be prime podcast-listening time. More on that book below.)

I’ve also had a ton of work recently – which means I can’t get on Facebook, skim through newsletters I’ve subscribed to, etc.

Not that I’m not grateful for the work.

But I’m actually quite “guilty” of the fact that I don’t work nearly as hard as anyone else.

No – seriously. I don’t.

I don’t need to commute to work (I work at home). I don’t need to work around anyone else’s schedule (well, usually . . . unless the other side in a contract must have a teleconference, which happens rarely). I have enough paid work that I’m able to do a consistent level of pro bono work for smaller entrepreneurs that I like. In fact – I like all of my clients. If I don’t like them, I fire them. And – yeah, here comes the part where you’re going to shoot me – if I have 8 hours’ worth of paid work per week, I can pay all my bills. (I told you that you’d be mad. And yes, yes, I said per week, not per day.)

I’ve found that when I have more work, I make better choices.

What exactly does that mean? It means that I find that my work “expands” to fit the time that I have.

It also means that I get in a lot more trouble when I have too much time on my hands.

When I have too much time on my hands, I eat more – and always the wrong things. I will go get a glass of wine, “because I can.” I won’t stay on an “eating program.” I will play Solitaire instead of learning something new. And, paradoxically, if I don’t have a “lot” of work, I actually put off doing the work that I have.

In short, I sloth-ify.

However, when I have a good bit of work to do, I must schedule in all the things that I want to do – whether it’s meal prep, Crossfit, walking the dog, reading my book club book . . . and so I wind up getting more done. (Isn’t that weird?)

Which brings me back to Unsubscribing.

Though I feel “guilty” about doing it . . . I mean, these emails are generally from “gurus” that I relate to, I like their thoughts, etc. . . . I have to look at what’s just cluttering up my Inbox.

For example, if I subscribe to podcasts I don’t listen to, they just sit in the podcast folder on my phone. No worries.

But if I subscribe to emails that I don’t read, they stress me out, because they’re in my Inbox.

As I said in the other post – I actually have often put things I am Unsubscribing from into a separate folder that just says Unsubscribe on it and the date. So for example, I see one that says 20160511 Unsubscribe. That means that I unsubscribed to the emails in that folder on May 11 2016.

So the next time I purge – meaning, with respect to this folder, right now – I delete the old folder without going through it. (I just did that now.)

This is a digital version of my “purge and hold” strategy, found in my book.

In Fempowerment, the whole first chapter is about cleaning/clearing out your life. One suggestion is to take everything that you are not “really sure” you want to get rid of, put it into a big bag, and put a date on it. I suggest a date that’s plenty far in the future – like 6 months.

If you open up the bag to get something out of it before the date comes up, then don’t change the date . . . just re-seal the bag. When the date comes up – give the contents of the bag away or throw them away (without re-opening). To make it easier, you can mark the bag as a “Goodwill” bag, a “Clothing Swap Party” bag, or a “Throw away” bag (good for, for example, opened beauty products/makeup cluttering up your drawer).

Like I said – this is the digital version.

I “date” the Unsubscribe folder. If I discover there’s something I miss reading, I can go back and re-subscribe to it. If not, I delete the folder during the next Purge-A-Thon.

The slippery slope of subscriptions.

One thing I’ve found this time around is that there are a lot of newsletters and the like that I actually did not subscribe to. This means that folks are selling their lists. I haven’t paid that much attention to it in the past, but I’m quite amazed by it this time around.

I can tell that the coaching association I belong to sold its list, because a lot of the stuff I’m unsubscribing to ties back to that group. (Shame on you, Association for Coaching.)

However, one of the real impetuses (impeti?) for this current round of Unsubscribing is the book that we’re reading in book club. It’s called Disrupted: My Misadventure in the Start-Up Bubble and deals with an over-50-year old ex-Newsweek tech reporter’s employment at Hubspot, an “inbound” marketing company. (If you’re at all in this industry – as I am – this book is hilarious and well worth the read – it has some laugh out loud moments.)

I have definitely fallen “prey” to the various “techniques” that he talks about in the book – which makes me a bit angry at myself. 🙂 As such, I’m going through my Inbox ruthlessly (take that, you inbound marketer!), eliminating all the emails related to “tactics” I “fell for” (e.g., a “free ebook” or the like).

I have put some of these into a 20170426 Unsubscribe folder, just in case I’m getting rid of email information that I might miss (these are mostly to do with folks who give me recipes, I’ll admit). But I think that it’s as unlikely as it always is that I will want to Subscribe back to any of them.

And I’m feeling I’m living the “Year of Less” thing.

Fewer emails to delete every morning is a good thing. Less guilt that I’m not reading emails that I (maybe accidentally) subscribed to is a good thing. Having a little bit more time to blog – which I’m doing so little of these days – is a good thing.

Now it’s time to go and do that work that I’ve been avoiding.

I have two projects – which means, of course, I’m procrastinating. Bad sloth, no! Better get to it!

Brave…So Brave…

Posted on February 15, 2017March 17, 2026 by Sandy

“Heels over head” has never been my jam.

Point of fact – I’ve actually never dived (diven? dove?) into anything. (Well, except for Love but I’m not quite sure that counts.)

Even as a little kid, the idea of doing something that would put me in the “heels over head” position terrified me. I’d get into the position that you see with these kids here – then I would jump into the pool (feet first) with my hands in the same position.

Also – since I went to a Catholic school where Gymnastics was a pre-requisite – I was basically an outcast.

I was a pretty smart outcast though – I did things like clean the gym, clean the equipment, spot others – anything to get away from the dreaded “heels over head” possibility.

The nuns figured this out at one point though – and they “made me” do a “flip” on the lowest bar of the uneven parallel bars. Since I couldn’t get into the position on my own, and was petrified to boot, 4 nuns had to basically haul my close-to-6-foot self (8th grade) to the bars, hoist me up until my stomach was on the bar and my hands white-knuckle gripping it, then two nuns dunked my head down and the other two threw my feet over my head. Everyone else in the class was cartwheeling, flipping, balance-beam-handstanding, vaulting, etc. but of COURSE stopped long enough to see me in this ignominious position. It was just GRAND.

When I was doing vertical gymnastics (a/k/a Pole Dancing), I was okay. Interestingly, I JUST figured out WHY.

To get into the position that you see in the photo, you don’t “dive your head down” into anything. Instead, you hold onto the pole, swing one leg up and above your hands, kick the other foot behind the pole to lock yourself in, and then slowly lower your head down. I could never do the moves that were the reverse – go into a handstand next to the pole, lock your legs onto it, then sit up from there.

Today was “upside-down day” at Crossfit.

The good part about my Monday and Wednesday morning classes is that I have my favorite coach, and I have my ‘Crossfit husband,’ who is better than I am with some things, worse with others, but we have the same sort of mentality and dynamic when it comes to Crossfit. If it weren’t for my coach and my ‘Crossfit husband,’ I’d still be snuggled up in bed now, not back home an hour after the workout. (Thank you Chelsea and James . . . )

Today two other guys were in class as well. (Normally, it’s just my ‘Crossfit hubby’ and me.) One is a guy I’ve been doing Crossfit with off and on for about three years. He, my ‘hubby,’ and I are about the same age. Then, there was a guy who I’ve worked out with a couple times, who is a few weeks out of On-Ramp. (He could be our son, age-wise, EASILY.)

Our workout today started with a “Skills section”:

Do three sets of:

3 wall walks
3 “skin the cats” on the rings
(and then some other, non-threatening, moves)

A “wall walk” is when you start out lying on the floor, with your feet against the wall. Then you “walk your feet up the wall” as you’re pushing back with your hands, until, in the end, you wind up in a handstand position against the wall. Then you walk back down.

A “skin the cat” is when you hold onto rings, bring your feet up in front of you and over your head (already bad), then back. Here’s a video (you need to click on it):

Details at GymnasticsWOD

When it comes to Wall Walks, I actually can kick my feet up onto the wall. Think basically like a downward dog, but my feet are up on the wall. I just can’t move any closer. So I’m kinda in an inverted “L” against the wall.

I practiced trying to take my weight off my hands a tiny bit, one after another. But just being my inverted-L-self against the wall is an uncomfortable position for me, and even taking a tiny bit of weight off of each hand in turn is a big, grunting effort. (Yes. I grunt.)

I watched my ‘Crossfit husband’ do three legit wall walks, getting all the way up to the wall in a full handstand upside down, and back. It was amazing! I was so proud for him!

And then, it was “skin the cat” time.

The “scaled” version of this is that you sit with your butt on the ground, and hold onto the rings hanging from the pull up bar above your head. Fingers out/back of hand towards you. Then, you kick up and basically hook one foot onto the strap that’s holding the ring above one hand, then you use your abs (!!) to hold that all together while you get the other foot and leg wrapped around the other strap on the other side. In this position, you’re off the ground, though your back is still basically facing the ground. As you move your feet up the straps/lean your head backwards, you ultimately wind up upside down. Then, you can take your legs off the straps and lower them over your head to the ground (and, theoretically, back up – hello, Abs). Again, to use a yoga analogy, it’s kinda like a plough . . . but in the air . . . and your feet keep going until your head is back up and your feet down, but your hands still holding onto the rings.

Then, you do the whole thing backwards, until you’re standing back at the rings like normal.

We were doing this whole progression three times.

The first time around when we got to the skin the cat, the coach came over to help me, but I couldn’t get my second foot off the ground. I’d get my right foot off the ground and onto the strap, but the best I could do was get my left toe weightless. Couldn’t move from there. I think that we both thought that this was going to be the best that I would get.

Now, mind you, this was a BIG DEAL because even in that position, I was “almost” upside down.

The second time around, our coach thought that our newbie could do it from the rings hanging in the middle of the room – so, legit going from standing holding the rings (instead of lying on the floor), hoisting himself up and then his legs over his head, and then back over his head and down. (Like in the video, above.)

And he DID IT.

I was SO proud for him. (He looked super surprised when he did the first one.)

Our coach moved from spotting him to coming back over to spot me. I was so excited for him, that the excitement kinda carried over and scared away the scared feeling. I also had a second of clarity, and remembered that I very much have a “good side” and a “not so great” side when it comes to all things Crossfit.

So, I started with my left foot up, first.

And, miracle of miracles, I felt a LOT more stable. I also realized that I could definitely get my right foot off the ground. And so, I did.

Everyone in the gym already knew that being upside down was NOT my jam. (Even the new guy.)

So the fact that there I was, hanging upside down from the rings, was a REALLY emotional moment. EVERYONE was excited for me (including me!)

I did it 2 more times with my coach spotting me, and even got my legs up and over my head (though I didn’t have the core strength to get them back over).

And then I started to feel dizzy. And sick.

the view outside the garage doors at our Crossfit gym

I hung out for a bit, but realized I had to get out of Dodge, just in case I threw up. I went outside, and it was really nice looking at the mountain. As I was heading out the door to get some fresh air, our coach said something really profound. She said:

Getting dizzy is your brain’s way of being sore . . . it’s a good thing.

I was able to get things under control, and luckily didn’t throw up. (You know that feeling you get in the back of your jaw, though, and you start salivating a lot? Yeah, not pleasant – I got that far but no farther.)

When our coach came out to check on me, we talked about how it was basically being scared that had made me feel so sick. The dizziness was likely from the upside down stuff – but the nausea?

Fear.

I was one of those kids with lots and lots of fears.

Fear of public speaking. Now I’m a public speaker in front of thousands – it’s a great story, if you want it, let me know.

Fear of heights. That one I gave away to Pachamama to take care of, on a mountaintop in Peru. You still won’t find me oh, say, free climbing, but I can cross a bridge or stand on a balcony without having a panic attack.

aaaaand, Fear of Heels over Head. Now, I’m still not going to be cartwheeling or diving into any pools in the near future. However, I definitely feel that I will try this “scaled” skin the cat again.

Because I feel like having been coached through it, I have broken the attachment to the fear.

When I was in the Marines, we were told that fear was a “useless” emotion, because it was scenarios we were making up in the future that might never come true. Our D.I. said that if the feared scenario came to pass, it was better to deal with it then (once) rather than obsessing about it over and over and over and it maybe never even coming true – and changing yourself and your Life because of it.

I even remembered what we were taught in Boot Camp about Fear as I was writing this.

We were told that if you sing a song, you are actually legit Fearless. The words take up one half of your brain, the tune the other half, and so whatever part of your brain is obsessing about the thing that you’re afraid of can’t get a word (or tune/feeling/emotion) in edge-wise.

Humming won’t do it, or “whistling in the dark” – unless that’s the side of your brain that is generating the chemicals that make up your Fear. You need both words and music to lock it down totally.

The key? You gotta know all the words. If you falter, the Fear can rush back in.

I’m going to have to give some thought as to what my Fear-banishing song should be.

Now it’s your turn…

* What are you afraid of?
* Who can coach you through an exercise addressing this fear?
* What song are you going to sing?

Will This Year EVER Be Over??

Posted on December 29, 2016March 3, 2018 by Sandy

I wanna wash this year right outta my hair…

The way that this year is ending, don’t you think that it’s time to get it out of all the “nooks and crannies” of your life?

One possible way is to cleanse and clear the energies of your home.

In this fairly long post, I will explain how to do just that.

So, let’s start.

Everything is composed of constantly changing energy.

You aren’t separate from the world and energy around you. What’s an example of this? Have you ever stepped into a room ‘charged’ from an argument? You feel it. So – while certainly more subtle – if you step into a room full of comforting and joyful things, you will get a similar energetic ‘charge.’

The energy that is invested in ‘things’ is powerful and important, and we can also train our brains to look for support by the way in which we order our world using techniques such as feng shui.

There are a few different types of feng shui – the type I have studied is often called “black hat” feng shui. However, all types of feng shui are based upon the belief that every geographic area is made up of 9 quadrants, called the “bagua.” Simply placing the “bagua” map on the area you are considering, you have regions in that room (or desk, or building) that correspond to parts of your life. I did a couple of in-depth podcasts about this…you can find them HERE and HERE. I also did an episode on ABC-TV on this subject – they used to have it up on their website, but it’s down now. I need to find the DVD with my copy, to post it here!

Anyway . . . so . . . if you really want the past year out of your life . . . I’d strongly suggest that you consider clearing its energy from your home, office, purse, car, etc.

These places are comprised of millions of overlapping energy fields. For example, let’s take a chair in your living room. That chair has residual energy from the raw materials that made that chair (e.g., the “energy” of a California oak will be different than that of an English oak). It has energy from the craftspeople who worked on that chair. Energy from former owners (do you have a dresser in your bedroom from an ex-mother-in-law who hated you? Why is that in your house?). Last but not least, that chair has your own residual energy from sitting in it. This doesn’t even consider the energy of the sun coming into your home, the energy of the home itself and its builders, the energy from your family, the energy from your pets, or the residual energy from interactions that have taken place in your home.

This is why, in my books Fempowerment and the Fempowerment Playbook, there are entire chapters dedicated to cleaning and cleansing.

What I said above about your chair – or your home – would also apply to your office, your purse, and the like. Because “You” are not separate from them. If you want to “neutralize” your surroundings to have a clean template for next year, you need to remember that these areas are not just an extension of your thoughts, intentions and feelings plus the energy of their furnishings and surroundings; in a larger, energetic sense, they are You.

“You” are no less your home than you are your body. Both are outer manifestations of your inner energy fields and Spirit – which is the true You.

In the deepest sense, your home reflects and mirrors your consciousness. Just as your body is “symbolic” of your inner state, your home also reflects that state. Therefore, as you can imagine, you can shift personal energy by shifting energy in your home. For example, windows are your eyes to the world around you. Just the simple act of cleaning your windows, with the Intent of being able to “see your way” in life more clearly, will effect that clarity.

Which gets us to the point of all this. How do you do it?

This clearing can take place in your office, your purse, your car, your house – your “wherever.” Let’s just presume that this will take place in your house.

The four steps are: (1) preparation, (2) purification, (3) invocation and (4) preservation.

Once completed, the area that you clear can be “neutralized” from energy carried forward from the past. It can become a peaceful oasis for you, but almost more importantly, it can attract and radiate what you would like in your life out into the world, becoming a beacon that will in turn direct more of that to you.

So, let’s get started!

PREPARATION

Where Intention goes, energy flows. So – to begin – you need to understand what your Intention is for this clearing. That’s right – no need to change into your coveralls just yet, ‘cos we’re starting in your head!

If your overall conscious and subconscious Intentions are aligned and are to instill an uplifting energy in the home for the betterment of the occupants and mankind – so it will be. If your overall Intention is to contribute to the vibrant health and well-being of the home’s occupants and thereby raise the energy of mankind – so it will be. Do you want to create an environment in which you can undertake the creative work you dream of? Or to create a warm social center where friends and family can gather to share hopes, laughter and tears? Take the time to clarify, define clearly, and write down your Intent.

This is an essential step. This is similar to preparing the soil before you seed the ground. Your Intention will be instilled in your home at the time of the clearing, even if you are not constantly thinking about it.

Take some time, and write your Intention down – focus on what you want to draw in, not so much on what you want to usher out.

Red carpet night conept with fence 3d illustration

Our mind can’t “hear negatives.”

That’s why, if you are walking down the red carpet, you tell yourself “Walk Tall,” not “Don’t Trip”!

So – positives!

What specific results do you want for yourself and the other occupants of the home? After you have clarified your overall Intention, decide what immediate and specific results you want. For example, if your overall Intention is to generate a loving, creative energy in the home, a specific Intention might be to shift energy in the home so that you can write poetry easily and creatively. This specific goal could be further broken down into specific objectives. For example, you might decide that you need to create a beautiful work space separate from the normal living spaces of the rest of your home in which to do your writing. Or if your overall Intention is to create a social center for friends and family, then you might want to consider what specific elements your heart tells you will help bring that Intention into being. Is it a kitchen with a big oak table to sit around in a light-filled room, where you prepare meals with friends? Or everyone gathered together with glasses of wine and take-out, watching movies and enjoying a crackling fire? Think of your overall Intention as an aerial picture, and your specific intentions as focusing on your street, your house, the rooms inside, the furniture inside, the books and flowers on the tables, and so on. What “supports” your Intention?

Start at the 10,000 foot level, and dive down into what this Intention will mean to you – See it. Smell it. Taste it. What in your house supports that – and what needs to move on to its next best use? I guarantee that something that’s energetically dead to you will be cherished by another.

As a wise person once said, “You need to empty your glass of beer to get the champagne in there – but pour the beer into your friend’s glass that only holds water now, so they can pour the water to someone who is parched!”

Think about the immediate, but also the long term, results of your Intention. Remember, as energy is always flowing, this clearing and arranging will not be a “one-time deal.” In fact, perhaps one of your intentions could be to clear, purify, and re-set the energy of your house to align with your Intention every Friday evening after a wonderful bath. Schedule it. Block the time in. This will keep your energy and Intention focused and current.

When you consider long-term results, you want to consider results that will help to “concrete-ize” your Intention.

For example, if your Overall Intention is a life that is abundant and prosperous, your specific intentions might be a financial increase at work, or getting rid of objects in the house that make you feel poor (a bookshelf made of concrete blocks and a plank, for example). Or a specific intention that supports that prosperous Intention might be living out a specific dream that will take money (like a luxury safari to Africa). The long-term result you desire could be a continuing and growing feeling of expansiveness; of always knowing that you have enough for all your needs to be met.

Or, if your Overall Intention is to have a home that contributes to the spiritual development of all occupants, your specific intentions might be the creation of a beautiful meditation room area and an altar in your home, focusing on colors and objects in the home that elicit a spiritual or uplifting feeling, and daily private meditation times becoming part of your normal routine. The long-term result might be that all members of the household have an increased sense of connection to their spiritual source, and all members feel more physically and spiritually vital and energetic.

We are incredibly fortunate to have had master hypnotherapist Susan Bird do a three-episode deep induction for cleaning and clearing out your past and bringing forth you best life ever. They are searchable in the podcast section, but to make it easy, the first of these can be found HERE.

Take some time, and explore your overall intention, your specific intentions, and the long-term result you are bringing into your life.

Now it’s time to get your hands dirty.

Touch everything – open everything – yes I said EVERYTHING.

You need to have your house prepared, if you are serious about flushing all of the energy through and out of it. As I mentioned above, the entire first chapter of my book Fempowerment deals with cleaning and clearing out, as does the first chapter of the Fempowerment Playbook. If you have either of these books, you can refer to them. You can also search back in this blog (search term “clearing”) for podcasts and blog posts full of details.

In general, you must have completely organized and cleared everything in your environment.

All drawers and closets, and any items with residual “energy” that do not resonate for you in the present (e.g., wedding dresses under the bed, dead plants, “fat clothes” and the like) must be dealt with. If you’re serious about not dragging last year and before into the upcoming year, you must make these steps in the same seriousness.

It is important to remember that all things in our homes are given importance because of the energy that we have tied to them. You may have items in your home that were given to you and you don’t feel you “can give up” (or else you will “insult” the giver); you might have furniture that was given to you by an aunt who you hate but it is “good” furniture and you therefore don’t want to part with it.

It is important to remember that the Universe can only fill your glass with new and beautiful gifts if there is room in the glass.

By the (sometimes difficult!) parting with personal items that do not resonate 100% with your Intention, you are giving the Universe the ability to replace these items with items that are 100% resonant. This leap of faith is critical if you are to lead a 100% energized and non-dissonant life. Remember the champagne -> beer -> water -> thirsty example above!

You should also endeavor to accomplish a full housecleaning.

This includes windows; pulling out appliances and cleaning behind them; etc. Yup, everything. For example, your refrigerator needs to support your Intention. Are there half-filled condiment bottles in there and ice-encrusted mystery packages in the freezer? It’s all gotta go. If you’re not willing to pull the fridge out, from an energetic level, it represents that there are parts of your life that you’re not “willing to” go to the effort to put right. I know. I know. It’s a huge pain. But the idea is to ensure that there are no lurking “bug-a-boos” that could come back to haunt you!

By the way – if you’re doing this all in one day, go ahead and leave your drawers and closets open (they do not need to be “wide open,” just a crack is enough), because you will purify each area, inside and out. Once the drawers and closets are purified and filled with your intention, they can be closed.

House all clean? Great! Next, you need to prepare yourself.

Take a long shower. Use a salt or sugar “scrub” (easily available at Trader Joe’s, etc., but be sure that it is organic and pure – no chemicals or additives!) Scrub all areas of the body, including between your toes and fingers. Remember – you’re leaving behind everything to enter this new year clean and clear.

Next, choose loose clothing that has a good energetic “feel” to you. It is important that you prepare yourself in the same manner you will be preparing your house. Do not wear jewelry (it gives off energy that can interfere with you feeling the energy in your house). Go barefoot, as it is easier to feel the energies of your house without shoes.

Finally, do a short “warm up” session to loosen your joints and your lymphatic system. The point is to get energy flowing through you and to unlock any blocked areas, so that joy and radiance can enter you and exude from all your cells, from head to toe. Breathe deeply. If you do yoga, perhaps you might do a few sun salutations.

PURIFICATION

Before you being to instill new energy into your home, it’s important to cleanse the overall space. Invoking energy into a home before the home is cleared is like picking a beautiful bunch of flowers but then putting it in a vase filled with stagnant water from a previous bouquet. The reason why rooms need to be cleansed is because the energy becomes stagnant and this stagnation affects the health and well-being of the occupants. Energy particularly becomes stagnant in the corners of a room, because energy travels in circular, spiral movements which cut off the corners. It also becomes stagnant if illness or negative emotions have been experienced in a room.

Choose a method that you will use for this purification.

Often, a rattle or a bell is used to break up and move stagnant energy. Does this speak to you? What about sage smoke? Candles? Your voice/singing? Opera music on your cell phone that you can energetically “hold and direct” into the corners of the room? (Yup, you guessed it – that’s mine. My favorite is HERE.)

Hold your Intention in your mind, and feel your home. What does your home feel like to you in your mind? What will “move” or “break up” the energies that are stagnant in that home?

Stand in the middle of the room, and take a few deep breaths.

If you are so moved, offer prayers to the Great Is, your guardian spirit, or the like for the help to clear this room. Then, circle the room, using the method you chose to break up and circulate the energy. Imagine it moving out of all areas – drawers, closets, under furniture, you name it. Usher this energy out of the room through an open window or door. If you close your eyes and use your imagination, you can utilize your hands to feel out any “sticky” areas of energy. Imagine using the sage smoke, or bell, or music to “un-stick” this old energy and invite it out the window.

INVOCATION

After your house is cleared of stagnant energies, it’s time to fill it with radiant, crystal-clear energy, and consecrate it to your Intention.

It is essential that you “call” or invoke energy into your home after it has been cleared. Not doing so would be like cleaning a flower vase but never putting fresh flowers into it. You can call the energy in with the same tools that you used in the previous work, but with a different intention. You now are calling, instead of clearing, energy. For example, you can use a bell to break up stagnant energy, and later use the same bell to invoke energy and Spirit. A drum can be a powerful device to dispel stagnant energy, and then to invoke a healing energy in the home. Consider here what methods might speak to you in calling the energy of your Intention to your home. You are calling upon guardians in the realm of Spirit to come forth, bringing in energy of healing and love. Clearing and calling may use different methods: Perhaps sage smoke to clear, and then a drum to call?

I personally like to work with essential-oil scented, pure beeswax candles (scent, light, fire and color).

Once my home is cleared, I light a candle in the center bagua area of the home, and then bring candles into each room and dedicate that room with light and candles to the Spirit. I light each candle from the central candle, so that the entire house is lit from the central Intention invoked with the session.

PRESERVATION

When each room is completed, the energy is “sealed” in by using a separate tool.

A standard method of accomplishing this is to use salt. You cast it lightly in a circle around the entire perimeter of the room, to “seal in” the energy of your Intention and “seal out” energy that is dissonant, stale, or negative. Other methods include sprinkling pure water around the perimeter, or beating a drum or wafting sage with an eagle feather all around the perimeter of the room. Your method will be specific to you, but should leave you with a feeling that the area is now completely safe and sealed away from the energies that you dispelled previously.

Finally, you will “set” your Intention.

One example of a way to “set” the Intention is to write down clearly on a piece of paper what the overall Intention is, and then fold the paper and place it in the soil of a new houseplant, near the roots. Each time you water this plant, you re-affirm your intention. It is important to note that if the plant dies, this does not say something about your Intention – but you should pay attention! Plants absorb energy from a house, but also are a bellwether for your actions with respect to your Intention. Did it die because you paid “too much attention to it” (overwatering, etc.)? Stop trying so hard – let the Universe do its work. Don’t push. Did it die because you neglected it? Perhaps you are not putting enough daily attention toward your Intention.

I know – it sounds like a lot!

But dozens and dozens of people seem to feel that “life as we know it” is coming to an end this year! As such, this post outlines some very concrete ways that you can make your home a harbinger of wonderful things to come for you and yours in this new year. Stop cowering in fear – get out your journal, get on your coveralls, apply some elbow grease, and sweep out the old and lock in the new!