TGIF!

YIPPEE! It’s Friday! I get to eat fat again!

I did have Bulletproof-esque coffee today, with a couple of pastured, local eggs in it, plus MCT Oil. (No dairy in the eating plan.) I matched it up with a smoothie of coconut flakes (not sweetened), the oats, cherries, and then some of the greens from the freezer, as well as a couple more eggs.

Right now, I’m having BPC with egg and MCT oil, plus raw carrots as my snack.

I mentioned earlier this week that I went to the doctor to address my back/hip issue that’s been going on for months. As I have blogged about before, I had seen my chiropractor (who told me about Pomroy in fact), did traction, saw my fascia guy, tried to address it with one of my Crossfit coaches, etc., but still no dice. I also sat on my @ss doing nothing for a few weeks to see if that would help (nope).

Oh – I was weighed there. (Did you know that a doctor has to weigh you or they can’t get compensated by the insurance? Yup. Weigh you, and take your blood pressure and pulse. Always wanted to know why they did that even if you were there for a sinus infection? You’re Welcome.) Their scale says I’m 2 pounds heavier than my scale does. I could put it down to the fact that I’d just had a full gigantic smoothie and bottle of water, or maybe my scale is just wrong. I’m going to report in from my scale though, because it’s not like I can hop on over and re-weigh myself weekly at the doctor’s office.

Oh – and the doctor  counselled me that my BMI was “borderline obese” and I “needed to do something about  it.” (Thanks, Doc.)

Take that, all my friends who constantly, CONSTANTLY say, when I’m frustrated by the growing joey in my lap, “But you look GREAT!!!”

And here’s a tangent. (How unusual for me.) In the Girls Gone WOD Podcast episode about eating disorders, one of the things that they go into for quite some time is folks who say, when seeing someone, “Wow! You look amazing!” (or some version of that). It would have never ever occurred to me to say that. The experts’ point was that you don’t ever really want to comment on how someone “looks,” because that can feed right into disordered eating.

The funnier thing is that I’ve seen a couple of friends recently who I have not seen in a while, and in each case they started with “Wow! You look so great!” or “Wow! You’re so skinny!” It was eery. I said “Thank you” to one, and pulled up my shirt to display my “joey” to the other (eee-yew!). Don’t put me in this position…!

If you see someone you haven’t seen for a long time, say: “Wow! I didn’t realize how much I missed you until I saw you!” – or something like that – Ok? Ok. Of course, easy for me to say since I’ve never said that when greeting someone. But it has always set me up to feel that I need to reciprocate with something about how they look – and if they look tired, or have gained a few pounds, or whatever, then I’m stuck.

AND SO…We’d left our heroine in her sexy washed-almost-white blue, backless hospital gown sitting on the waxy white paper on the doctor’s table….

The doctor sent me to get Xrays, and the good thing is that, this morning, he sent me an email and apparently my bones look fine. YAY! My hubby couldn’t figure out why I was so stressed out about that, but I reminded him we have two friends who, in their 40s, needed hip replacements. They were just like me – active, eating right, etc. – and then their bodies just crumbled at the hip. No bueno.

I have an appointment with the “non-surgery” department next week to come up with a plan. I’ll be curious to see what this guy says. I will probably not utter the “C-word” [Crossfit] because if he’s a hater, he’ll just presume “Oh THAT’S what did it.” As those of you who know me know, this issue came out of nowhere, after I’d been babying my body for nearly 1/2 a year, since receiving the news from my doctor that my metabolism and hormones were severely out of whack after all the long-distance training (which had ended a year before, mind you). So I’ve done no pounding (e.g., running, jumping); worked on form, form, form; no heavy weights related to lower body work (e.g., anything attached to a squat), etc. But the minute I utter the “C-word” I’m sure it will be over.

So I guess I will stress what I’ve been doing at the “C-word” – namely, rowing, upper body strength work, stretching, and the like – without mentioning “that word.” I am not particularly sure if I should even talk about the fact I’ve been working on slow air squats (which do not hurt – though situps do, go figure), because I’m afraid somehow that might be considered the culprit. Maybe I will call them “grand pliés.”

We all realize, of course, that now that I’ve obsessed about this, the guy I meet will have Greg Glassman’s visage tattooed to his arm and be wearing a Games T-shirt. (I should be so lucky.)

Today is “go slow, be nice to yourself” day on the plan. (As are Saturday and Sunday.) I’m thinking about going to that pool I joined and doing some slow laps. I think that sounds nice.

So, if you’re with me this week, how’s it going? PM me or send me a Comment. Frustrated? Going strong? There are a few of you who just couldn’t start on the holiday weekend, so are going to be starting this coming Monday. How about ya’ll… Ready? Believe me, getting to Friday, after Wednesday & Thursday of just protein and veg, is Nirvana. ;-)

OH AND – if you suddenly realize you ate something that wasn’t “in Phase,” I’d be curious how it happened. I had it happen yesterday. I was at the Farmer’s Market gathering up lots of nummy fresh produce with a friend of mine I hadn’t seen in forever. We were nattering away, and she wanted a chai latte with almond milk from the guy who sells them there – they’re not sweet, they’re spicy and super delish. She was ordering hers, and I thought “Wow, that looks really good” and so got one. We kept talking and it wasn’t until I was throwing the cup away that I realized….”OOPS…I’m in Phase 2, which is only protein and veggies.” I actually stood frozen over the garbage can with my hand still out after the lightbulb went off. Oops.

So my learning was that I was (a) out of my house and (b) talking with a friend and not paying attention to what I was putting in my mouth.

The idea here is obviously not to then put the back of your hand to your forehead saying “Woe is Me!  All is Lost!,” give up and dive into a pile of Oreo cookies (double stuff, natch). Instead, take specific note of how it happened – and just vow for the next 30 days not to put yourself in that situation again. There’s no question if we’d somehow been in my house yesterday and I was making her that spicy almond milk chai latte, I would be looking at the ingredients and (perhaps wistfully) thinking “Nope, can’t do that until tomorrow.” OR, if I’d been at the farmer’s market alone, I would have seen the guy selling the spicy almond milk chai lattes and thought: “Wish the market was tomorrow!” But combining the two put me on “remote control.”

This is a super good learning for me though! I mean – come on – we all got our 10-20-30-80 pounds overweight in stages. We could have turned around earlier…before Φ was such a big angle…and stepped down from A back to Ax. But in a lot of instances, we just don’t realize what’s caused us to vector away from the path. At least this is the case with me.

When I was younger, although I lived through the period of the worst food advice in the history of mankind (thank you, Ancel Keys), I would apply it, and lose the pounds that had crept on (hello, rice cakes). Then I’d return to what my Mom had raised us on – whole grains, fruit, veg, meat. No desserts (unless it was your birthday), no potato chips, no trips to McDonald’s, etc. Which is how I kept the vector angle down, until a fistful of years ago.

The thing is, my husband and I have pretty much gone downhill holding hands smiling. (When all else fails, blame the husband. :) ) Before we lived together, I wasn’t all that interested in food. But then we went on our first trip together – a first class cruise of French Polynesia. Avec all you can eat, whenever you want, lobster/steak/desserts/crepes, baguettes, baguettes, baguettes made every day, did I mention baguettes? Oh and cheeeeese? We came back from that two week trip a horrifying 10 pounds heavier a piece, and then goaded each other along from there. Worse, once we were living together and I’d been “downsized out of” my job, my hubby suggested that, instead of trying to get another general counsel position, I take care of shopping/cooking/the food.

My husband is a city boy, and doesn’t like to exercise. And loves good food. However, when we met he was a McDougall vegan who didn’t drink. I ruined him – took a non-exercise lover and introduced him to the excesses of food and drink ;-) (No wonder he married me.) I got to love cooking, and as most recipes are for 4, and it was all so good…

Another part of the problem, though, was that when I had gained weight in the past, I was a metabolically active, active woman (who wasn’t particularly interested in cooking). So I was able to exercise, eat “pretty” right (margaritas and chips with gal pals notwithstanding), and get back to my ideal shape and weight. But after doing the Ironman, then having a hysterectomy (though they did leave the ovaries), then doing 5 marathons in a year, then the triathlon,then I think likely going through menopause, my body was so whacked out that it didn’t know how to cope any more.

I’ve ballooned 20 pounds in the past three years – which is not tied directly to food, since I’ve been the chef de la maison since about 2004. The doc says it’s the whacked out metabolism from hormones and long distance exercise. Now, granted, I had gained 10 or so pounds slowly after taking over cooking, but photos from 2006 still show me at my ideal weight/muscular look – I wasn’t just a scarecrow as I’d been my whole life (a few deviations notwithstanding). I was muscular and slim. Through 2012 (I have a diary – I checked) I was up about 15 pounds.

But then, between the end of 2013 and now – BLAM, 20 pounds like a ton of immovable cement.

I’m aiming for 30 pounds to be “released” from my body. (Don’t use the word “lost” – it implies “found” again! :-) ) That will still put me about 10 pounds up from my old ideal/muscular/slim weight, but that’s fine, I’m older.

Anyway. It’s time to get to work. That’s my story – and my learning from my “miss” yesterday with the latte. How’s by you?